written in the stars
flyttar till london den 5e januari. stoooooooked. ska bli så jävla nice!
sing
facebook funkar inte. hotmail funkar inte. tumblr funkar inte. och av någon jäkla anledning har alla mina mediaspelare bestämt sig för att bråka med mig, så jag kan inte kolla på film. sååå frågan är, what to do? slänger seriöst både mobilen och datorn i golvet snart. haha, glad tjej!
dear god
pajjade mitt knä igår påväg till jobbet. fick spendera 4 timmar på akuten, och efter röntgen kunde de konstatera att inget var brutet/krossat. fick en linda runt knät och ett par kryckor att hoppa runt med. awesome!
dagen har jag spenderat med min kära laptop. har hunnit kolla på senaste avsnittet av the walking dead, fyra avsnitt av melissa and joey, easy a, the hole och the kids are all right. gaaaanska seg dag om man säger så.
imorgon får jag lön, på fredag blir det stockholm igen (får väl se hur det går med mitt knä). kryckor eller ej, jag ska dit.
dagen har jag spenderat med min kära laptop. har hunnit kolla på senaste avsnittet av the walking dead, fyra avsnitt av melissa and joey, easy a, the hole och the kids are all right. gaaaanska seg dag om man säger så.
imorgon får jag lön, på fredag blir det stockholm igen (får väl se hur det går med mitt knä). kryckor eller ej, jag ska dit.
god hates us
so far away
helgen spenderades i stockholm, där avenged sevenfolds spelning ägde rum. kan väl säga att jag blev pretty speechless. fyfan alltså, så sjukt underbart. kom nästan längst fram, och rakt framför mig var synyster gates (dock skuttade han ju runt lite på scenen, men 90% av tiden stod han där). nu har jag drabbats av någon slags hjärtesorg och den försöker jag nu kurera med cola och so far away. sista dagen med cola förövrigt, nu jävlar ska jag bli skinny!
skinny genes
söndag med sin vanliga ångest. kommer troligtvis inte flytta mig ifrån soffan förrän inatt någon gång. cheers.
hook me up
sitter och lyssnar på the veronicas för första gången på typ hundra år, dricker cola och grubblar på vad fasiken jag ska göra med mitt hår. HUM.
lux
drabbades av ett gigantiskt saknaluxmoment. hjärtesorg på högsta nivå. mitt fina lilla land. jag saknar att vara så bekymmerslös som jag var. att kunna leva i nuet, aldrig behöva tänka på morgondagen. jag saknar alla fina människor jag träffade. jag saknar att dra på mig ett par heels och gå ut och dansa ända fram till morgonen. att vara bakfull hela helgen på grund av för många tequilashots. bråk med portugisen. söndagsfikan på italiano. tjejkvällar på utopolis. köra helt fel med mathilda, och på något mystiskt sätt hamna alldeles rätt tillslut. kolla på film med två sömniga barn. kvällspromenaderna igenom en dimmig stad. kycklingchips och jordgubbar.
jag vill tillbaka. jag måste tillbaka. så att jag kan andas igen.
jag vill tillbaka. jag måste tillbaka. så att jag kan andas igen.
wonderful life
jag försöker och försöker, men det blir aldrig tillräckligt. jag börjar bli så trött på det här. och det blir inte bättre av att jag inte har en aning om vad jag ska göra..
work
äntligen klar med en jobbvecka. imorgon ledig, sen blir det ytterligare 6 dagar med jobb. uäh.
the runaways
cherry bomb
jag har hamnat i en sån där period där allt bara är skit. jag mår uselt, jag orkar ingenting egentligen, och jag bara bråkar med alla mina vänner. jag kan inte hjälpa det, och det suger. det enda jag gör är jobbar och sitter i min soffa. det är väl tur att det är så kasst väder iallafall, så jag slipper ha ångest över att jag knappt visar mig ute.
fixed at zero
alive
de senaste dagarna har jag mest jobbat och dött av värmeslag. besökte göteborg i lördags för lite gaddning hos micke b, så nu är diamanten äntligen fixad. fick även lite söta fladdermöss på armen, helnöjd! nu ska jag äta lite och sen kolla på någon film. PUSS.
we'll be a dream
spenderat dagen på stan med mammis. kom hem med ett solpuder, en ögonsfransböjare och två nagellack. nu sitter jag och slökollar greek, sen är det jobb om en halvtimme!
whip it
hold your head high gorgeous
so hold your head high gorgeous, people would kill to see you fall. in the dead of the night they can't hear you screaming. you swear revenge, against them all. so stay strong beautiful, it won't matter if they think less of you here. but you cry by the window when wishes in moonlight don't come true, doesn't mean you have to fear. so never take the words he said to heart darling, he has no idea what he meant. to you it meant a life time, to him, a lie worth less than a cent. so don't drown yourself in what you call medicine honey, it will only do you harm. because you never got drunk enough to get him off your mind. so don't believe you will never amount to anything sweetie, you truly have no idea what you're worth. i see what you're trying to hide from me, i understand how much you're hurt. so don't be afraid to crumble love, have you forgotten who you are? you walk around thinking you aren't beautiful, the truth could never have been more far. so when you forget about him, don't regret the pain you felt. it'll only make you better, and you'll know how to play the hand you're dealt. so hold your head high gorgeous, show the world you're fine. don't give in to the heartache, because people would kill to see you fall.
the four day theory
åh. <3
masquerade
jag är fruktansvärt dålig på att ta nya bilder insåg jag precis. gud, jag har ungefär tusen saker jag måste fixa känns det som. och det slutar alltid med att jag sitter i min soffa, dricker cola, läser bloggar och kollar tumblrs. jag är jävligt bra på att prioritera känns det som.
it's alright, it's ok
oj, för längesen som jag uppdaterade bloggen, ska verkligen försöka skärpa mig. livet rullar på, fyller mina dagar med jobb och greek och försöker att inte tänka alltför mycket. fyllde 20 i fredags, kändes hur bra som helst verkligen. nu ska jag återgå till att droola över cappie, hi.
billionaire
en av de finaste killarna som finns.
håller förövrigt på att försöka fixa till mitt liv. svåra beslut som måste tas, lite småjobbigt, men förhoppningsvis blir det bra i slutändan.
founder's day
hooooly fuck vilket bra avsnitt. mer spännande säsongsavslutning får man ju leta efter. can't wait till säsong 2 börjar. ohmygod.
in another life
this is to pushing on splintered walls of the world, trying to break free. this is to 4am phone calls and tears that can't be wiped away by tissues. this is to the hero dying in the end, because he couldn't overcome evil. this is to every oxymoron in the book, and to the unspoken ones; to the people that are oxymoron's themselves. this is to red wine and cigarettes on the bathroom floor, to the dog that died after thirteen years of being your best friend. this is to valued phone numbers that got lost in the washer, torn into million little pieces. this is to sneaking out of the window in your room, careful not to hit the area around the floodlight. this is for two-star hotels and nervous skin brushing together. this is for unwanted help and most needed attention; to the girls that put away messages in hopes that he'll understand, when really, he doesn't. this is to not only the guys being heart-breakers, but the girls as well. this is to the victims and the victimizers; to the people that couldn't help it when they bled. this is to those who try their hardest to play piano, but their fingers aren't long enough. this is to the girls and guys that had their virginity stolen; who were raped and beaten. this is to those that had their hearts ripped from their sleeves. this is to those that haven't been honored yet; to those who deserve it. this is to believing every lie. this is to being sick to my stomach just thinking about him loving someone else. this is to the pain i hold in every day. this is to the escape i thought i found in him. this is to those who live with a heart that has long since been broken. this is to those who live. this is to all the what ifs and to the wishes that'll never come true. this is to all the words you never said and to the ones we choke on. this is to holding your breath in that one perfect moment and being terrified that you'll blink and it'll all be gone. this is to when it is all gone and you feel like you have nothing left. this is to realizing that is wasn't your fault and that they're never coming back. this is to those who never got to say goodbye after saying something harsh before they left. this is to everything you thought once meant something you never did. this is to those who feel better aching than empty. this is to what didn't happen. this is to the tomorrows that are just another thing to get through. this is how i wish i'd never come that close to loving you. this is to realizing that you are on your own. this is to those who are dying to be alive. this is to knowing a relationship may or may not work, but taking the leap anyway. this is to the chaos within you that gives birth to a dancing star. this is to sticking your fingers down your throat, in hopes that they'll accept you. this is to every tear you've wasted on people who never cared. this is to sitting and waiting for your phone to ring. this is to being ignored; this is to him knowing he's ignoring you. this is to trying to be imperfectly perfect. this is to finding him, and holding on tight. this is to the notes on your wall that you write to yourself. this is to the girl behind that smile. this is to the boy that never gets the girl. this is to those movies and magazines; the ones that make girls stop eating, stop breathing, stop caring. this is to wanting to speak the most honest words you've never spoken in your life, not knowing whether they shold bring you closer to living or dying. this is to all of us who cry with dry eyes. this is for those who fall in love with their dreams, and wake up only to wish to be sleeping again. this is to world peace. this is to not knowing. this is to not wanting to know. this is to losing a pregnancy you didn't want in the first place and dying inside over it. this is to true love never ignited. this is to prose and poetry and those with tender hearts. this is to those who'll never get it. to those who wonder where love starts. this is to that one person who thinks you're the most kind, sweet, smart, and beautiful person ever. this is to the one person who thinks you mean everything. this is to losing that one person. this is to loving him, but having to say no to him. this is to hearing about his fuck buddies. this is to having him in your arms again, but knowing it won't last. this is to those nights where you just can't sleep because every word they said to you replays over and over. this is to those days when you just stay at home, because your heart is too weak to take in laughing. this is to those morning wake up calls he used to give you and the "sweet dreams" text messages before you fell asleep. this is to piggy back rides and cigarette smoke and those nights on the sidewalk where the two of you were the two of you again, after so many years of changing. this is to him telling you secrets that no one is supposed to know. this is to the girl that puts on his jacket when she's cold and this is to the guy that catches her smelling his scent. this is to being his head rest and his hand to hold when he's drunk and to being just another how's it going when he's sober. this is to letting go just as he starts to hold on. this is to the boy who says, "no, i don't want to leave you out" and the way you find more meaning in it than there is. this is to all the friends in the spotlight and especially to the one girl who isn't. this is to all the friends you'll never have. this is to beautiful boys who are just beautiful friends. this is to your hands on the violin or the cello or guitar or pen, and how beautiful they are. this is to the kid sitting in the corner away from the crowd because he doesn't fit in. this is for that same kid that created the crowd in the first place. this is to the ones that sit at home, lonely, hoping to find someone just like them. this is to the people who constantly want to bring you down because you were successful and they couldn't come close. this is to the boys that turned our hearts to glass just to shatter them and use the pieces to cut the wounds a little deeper. this is to all the times i wish i had said no. this is to all the times i knew what he was doing and i ignored it. this is to all the girls who let their friends walk all over them and cry themselves to sleep at night. this is to being his passenger. this is to that tingly butterfly feeling you get when they're around. this is to the night when feelings changed. this is to the broken mirror and the blood on your fist. this is to the very first kiss. this is to the eye contact, avoiding it, keeping it, trying to hide it. this is to feeling emotionless and watching yourself bleed to know you still feel. this is to the girl that never gives up. this is to the boy that lets her give up. this is to the parents that are so naive. this is to the virgins; the ones that are saving themselves for the right one. this is to the whores who feel so alone, they'd do anything to have someone for one night. this is to the swingers, the players, the lovers and the haters, for watching each others hearts break. this is for the average girl, who listens to her skinny friends complain about being fat. this is to the scrawny boy when he took his first steroid. this is to the gays who were beat for being something they couldn't help. this is to the ones who commit suicide because they couldn't take it anymore. this is to the little girls who look up to their older sisters. this is to the older sisters who loop up even more to their little sisters. this is for teaching yourself how to care, when it's the last thing you want to do. this is to the ones who still care, reciting promises of forever. this is to bruises on your elbows from a concert you wished had never ended. this is to being pushed up against a barrier and sweated on by an idol. this is to hugging that bassist that made your heart beat faster. this is to the fish that killed off all the others in the tank and now just want to die. this is to being so in love that it scares you. this is to the words never spoken; this is to fragile ones and the ones that never let them bruise. this is to those who attempt perfect, but know they'll never achieve it. this is to those who dwell on the past - who forget to live in the present. this is to those who fight for the weak and the hopeless. this is to those who never give up on their dreams, no matter what. this is to the girls who pretend to be supergirl, just to hide their pain. this is to the boys who made them hurt. this is to the mothers who protect their children. this is for the children who cry themselves to sleep at night, wishing their parents loved them. this is to those who died because their parents beat them. this is to those who survived and have become stronger, better people. this is to the people that don't even have enough. this is to you.
strike one
min dag har bestått av the hills, the hills, och återigen the hills. oh, i love my life. funderar på fullaste allvar att flytta till hollywood, blondera håret och gå runt i high heels hela dagarna. och bitcha mot allt och alla. hihi, fun.
dear john
when i look at you
not big
jag gillar verkligen att när man erkänner att man faktiskt tycker om sitt liv någorlunda bra, så ska något hända som fullkomligt får allt att rasa. typ "oj, josefine är lycklig? det måste vi ändra på" och så ba *poff* "in your face bitch!". eeeeh. ja. fuck it. rent ut sagt.
keep holding on
riktigt jobbig kväll. för mycket tankar och skit i huvudet. nu ska jag gömma mig under täcket med massa sorglig musik. uppdaterar mer imorgon, då är jag förhoppningsvis på bättre humör.
rome
sitter hemma hos alexander helt ensam, han är på något föräldramöte. jag firar med donuts och senaste gossip girl, hihi. fettotjej är jag.
alice in wonderland
